Jennifer Killgore when I was a much younger man, seems like a century ago, I thought my world would end if my friend Peter was no longer my friend. He was the senior in my school and no one messed with him. He was also my neighbor and never allowed anyone to mess with me. He constantly reminded me that I was his friend, he was not mine.
I followed him like a puppy dog day in day out, when home for lunches from school, mornings to school and evenings returning to home. To be clear, this has but ONLY A PALE IMITATION to your relationship, where, in as much as he was my to die for friend, he was only that, a friend.
There was another friend who was always there for me each and every time Peter treated me poorly and that was more often than when he treated me well. I did not share the same desire to be with that friend however.
One very sunny afternoon, when returning to school after our lunch (we always went home for lunches) Peter doing what he very often did, ran ahead, not waiting but instead forcing me to try and catch up to him, only stopping when he arrived at the small store so I could show my gratitude by paying for his treat before returning to school; He knowing how very much I loved butterflies, screamed from his distance saying, “I got a surprise for you!”
In my country of birth, mid-days got so very hot, it would literally melt the surface tar on the streets.
As Peter ran off in the distance, leaving my still unknown surprise behind for me, I arrived foolishly thinking he was being truthful. At the spot of his surprise, I realized that Peter had caught a butterfly; he had then place the butterfly on the street and placed melted tar on the tips of BOTH WINGS: The butterfly was clearly alive but if I freed it I would have to rip its wings off and surly it would eventually perish.
It would take far too long a piece to express to you the emotions that overwhelmed me at that moment. I stood there knowing there WAS ONLY ONE CHOICE.
So I killed it.~ That day I killed my fatal attraction of a kind with Peter, I killed my unhealthy dependence and yes I know I also killed something in me.
Many years after I returned to my homeland and did make a point of dropping in to see if Peter was still around. He was and what he had become, sadden me however did heal that part of me that died so many years prior.
Take the pathway most healthy, maybe a part of you will be sacrificed but the soul’s journey is long and time will heal most wounds.